Friday, January 29, 2010

Pacquiao tops list: Five guys Joshua Clottey can, cannot beat

Obviously, Joshua Clottey is a marketable commodity. But his pre Manny Pacquiao fight remarks must be taken with grains of salt, maybe 12 million grains of salt.

Like President Bam Bam in his feisty State of the Union speech Wednesday night, Clottey is hitting all the right notes.

The Ghanaian is saying that Megamanny is not superman. He says he knows how to handle southpaws. He says he won’t be in the Cowboys Stadium on march 13 merely to collect the biggest purse of his distinguished if hardly remarkable career.

Speculative promises are one thing and hot air is another. Surely, Clottey is entitled to the preflight palaver but, when he says his prayers and tucks himself into bed at night, does he believe what he says?

I don’t think so because he is not The Man who will stop The Manny.

Which brings me to a little list of fighters Clottey won’t beat and fighters he can beat:


1. MANNY PACQUIAO: The Pacman is still climbing up the ladder, a frightening thought for any foe. Is you ready for this, Mr. Mayweather? Give Sugar Shane Mosley a slim chance to derail the Pacman Express and give Mayweather the greater possibility of doing so with his slap and run style. Clottey runs second to Manny every time. Great writer J.D. Salinger just died at 91 which reminds me that, come March 13, the "Catcher in the Rye" will be Clottey, catching nearly all of Pacquiao's punches.

2. FLOYD MAYWEATHER: Obama’s new chant is jobs, jobs, jobs, only one letter different than Money May’s old chant of jabs, jabs, jabs. I doubt Clottey wins a single round with Mayweather rolling those shoulders, dipping those hips and ramming that jab in his kisser.

3. SUGAR SHANE MOSLEY: Nearing 40 but he’d be 40 and fabulous against Clottey. Mosley’s work rate and stretch run would give him a clear cut victory on points.

4. LUIS COLLZAO: Does Lefty Louie from Coney Island carry the swine flu? I wonder the way he gets avoided. He and Clottey will never fight, being in different promotional camps but Collazo is another portsider who Josh would only be joshing with.

5. YURI I’M NO BORE, MAN, FOREMAN: Rabbi to be would take Clottey to shul, er I mean school over 12 rounds and take comfotrtable decision. Only 27, Foreman’s confidence got huge boost with title victory over proven banger Daniel Santos. This could happen as both are Top Rank cattle, er I mean chattel.

JOSHUA CLOTTEY CAN BEAT: 1. RICKY HATTON: This fight carried on Comedy Central, ho, ho and few more hos.

2. ANDRE BERTO: Never happens as Uncle Bob and Uncle Al (Haymon) fighers rarely mix it up. Berto probably nips Clottey but, properly inspired and with a trainer who pushes him from rounds eight through 12, Josh could possible defeat Berto.

3. ANTONIO MARGARITO: Revenge bout for Clottey but unlikely to happen. Who knows what Bandito Margocheato has left after suspension year on shelf? Arum might make this bout after both get beaten by his Megacash Cow from Gen San.

4. YO PAULIE MALIGNAGGI: Think Clottey would prove too physically strong for sorehanded Brookllynite. Unlikely to ever happen but it would be interesting but short of compelling.

5. CORY SPINKS: Joshua could beat Cory but they will never fight and Cory would put on a boxing clinic to nab a points verdict. It would take extra effort for Clottey to defeat the jabbing master out of ‘The Lou.


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